How I’m Making This Christmas Stress-Free, Affordable, & Actually Joyful

With not a gift-guide in sight

The traditions we hope to start as a family deserve their own essay: sourdough cinnamon rolls, Advent practices, and nightly neighborhood strolls with hot cocoa, to name a few. But my son is one and a half years old. He will not remember this Christmas, but his body will remember a stressed-out mom.

These are the early years. There’s no rush to nail down every tradition, buy every present, or attend every party. I can do less and set a baseline where I am not stressed, excessively spending, or missing the joy of the season. And hopefully, in the future, I’ll be able to recognize when celebration tips into exhaustion before it’s too late.

So I made a list of all of the ways I hope to do Christmas differently this year. None of these ideas is revolutionary—unless I actually put them into practice.

A Stress-Free Christmas

Planning in advance helps lower my stress levels—until something goes wrong. Then, it’s up to me to steady my reaction and let go of what doesn’t matter. Which I can’t do if I don’t start my days with God and leave plenty of margin in our lives.

Here’s how we hope to do this practically:

• Not maxing out the calendar — We’re being very selective about what we commit to, prioritizing moments with our community over saying yes to everything. It’s really hard for me to miss a special seasonal thing, but I will end up overwhelmed if I try.

• Limiting travel — We used to visit every family member and friend we could fit in. Since we were flying from out of state, lugging suitcases full of gifts, it felt like we were wasting the trip if we didn’t. Now we limit travel and host mid-December instead of right before Christmas. I know that doesn’t work for everyone, but spreading the visits out has made a big difference.

• Sharing the load — Finding ways for everyone to contribute is easy; letting go of control can be much harder. One example of this is our upcoming Friendsgiving with our Home Group, where everyone brings a dish. Or a Secret Santa, where you only need to buy a gift for one person. Whoever is hosting knows we will all pitch in before and after.

• Planning a dedicated day to decorate — In the past, we’ve squeezed in decorations here and there or set them up on an already jam-packed day. This year, we are dedicating a whole day to make it a slow, and hopefully enjoyable, process. Putting up ornaments might be a little tricky with a one-and-a-half-year-old, so expectations will be low in terms of “productivity.”

An Affordable Christmas

This is the part of the year where it’s easy to “loosen the purse strings” and let the contents of the bag roll away into the gutter. It’s not easy, but we’re trying to be especially thoughtful with what’s left of the year and significantly limit our budget. I’ve already found myself wanting to break our spending freeze at least a dozen times. It’s on sale! It’s only $12! It’s almost sold out! But this practice is helping me prioritize the important things.

Here’s how we hope to do this practically:

• Cutting out extras — Too many lattes (my kryptonite), unnecessary decorations in our Target runs, and takeout. There will be plenty of moments for feasting this season, and I can go a year without adding anything to our holiday collection aside from handmade treasures.

• Meal planning out of the freezer — If you’re anything like me, your freezer has quite a stash around this time of year. I’ve been going through the contents and choosing meals based on what we already have, even if they’re simple and boring. We can save the extra delicious dinners for the main days of celebration.

• Shopping with sentimentality — This year, I’m going to bookstores, local shops, and using my good old-fashioned brain instead of online gift guides that all look the same. I want our gifts to feel personal, and I don’t want to fall victim to a purchase just because something is on sale.

An Actually Joyful Christmas

How often do we get to the end of the Christmas season feeling exhausted, burnt out, and disconnected? It takes work to cultivate joy and step out of some of the unhelpful habits that build up throughout the year.

Here’s how we hope to do this practically:

• Playing Christmas music morning and night — And yes, we’ve already started! Switching between the classics and our favorite Christmas worship albums throughout the day keeps us all in the lightest mood.

• No work or technology in the evenings — Just fires, books, crafts, and Christmas movies. I am terrible at turning off my brain at the end of the night, so setting a hard and fast rule helps me stay present. We’re going to be reading Waiting for Jesus by Rich Villodas together, so we’ll plan time for that before bed too.

• Writing letters & making gifts — So much of what holds me back from giving sentimental gifts is when I compare what I can create to someone who makes a career out of DIY-themed Reels. Trying to make everything Pinterest-worthy takes the fun out of the most unique and thoughtful gifts.

• Practicing generosity — While we are cutting spending in many areas, we want to be looking for ways we can bless the people around us. Making meals, dropping off treats, and giving gift cards will be more memorable and meaningful than any indulgence.

How much of what we do during the Christmas season is rooted in pressure or obligation, and how much do we actually want to do? Where’s the line between binging and feasting? How can I offer my family the best gift of all, being non-anxious, present, and at peace? I’m going to give it my best shot—let’s see how I do!

How are you making your Christmas stress-free, affordable, and joyful this year?